Running Diary

❄跑步日记

22.12

今早出门气温下降了许多，跑步时每一次吸气都夹杂了吸入胸腔的冷空气，公园里只有牵狗的女人，来回经过一个头发花白穿着奥红色羽绒服的老太太，我们对上眼神之后相视一笑。跑过公园里长满青苔的坟墓，跑过野蛮生长的涂鸦和开展路边无人问津的小花然后回到了家。

24.12

Today is Christmas Eve and I ran 4km in the morning. It is about 0°C , at the beginning I wore a down liner with a jacket. After 800m I felt my back beginning to sweat, and took off my down liner and then tied it around my waist, just a jacket to block wind. I also wore a red scarf bought today because of my Zodiac year, to avoid breathing in the cold air.

28.12

I haven't run for 4 days. But I have done a lot of things. Yesterday I bought a quick dry long sleeve for running, lest I get cold through soaked cotton sleeve during next jogging.

Yesterday evening I went to Herne with my boyfriend and friends. The environment in Herne was dirty, Graffiti squiggly grew all over the walls, heaps of rubbish piled up. I couldn't see a sign of developed country. I felt I wasn't in Germany, but in Turkey.

Last night I also fell down, because there was much ice on the road, what's funny was that my boyfriend warned me not to run to avoid falling before.

Today, about 5 am. I suddenly woke up, and then found my boyfriend scanning his phone. You wake up so early? "I haven't slept", he told me that he had been continually chatting with Gemini about his future and was so excited and worried.

Today I took a shower. The temperature was very low so that bravery is needed to take a shower. And the smoke alarm is always sensitive. When I washed a little bit longer, it went off. So I had to open the window when I was taking a shower under the risk of being peeped at, so the alarm wouldn't go off.

07.01.2026

雪一直断断续续的下，每当我为上一场（也许就是昨天）下的雪即将融化而感慨的时候，老天总是不经意在我的窗外又送来一场大雪，让我忍不住盯着窗外发呆。 歌单也很久没更新，一直听得还是 2024 年整理的歌单。 我又爱上的敲代码的感觉，不经感概写代码最重要的还是思路，让我缕清了思路之后好像我又从 ai 那里夺回了控制权，断点调试又让我体验到了侦探的快乐。 最近一直心情不太好，我一直以为是天气，工作，服务器又黑和假期结束的原因，其实不然，是主权被剥夺的痛苦，ai 剥夺了我思考的权力，只剩下麻木的眼镜盯着屏幕发呆。又因为繁重的工作让我感慨，所谓 ”经济独立“ 不过是从一个”以爱为名“牢笼逃到另一个 ”当牛做马“ 牢笼。 不过我突然意识到，如果想要掌控感，你要先尝试去理解它。人驾驭不了茫然，也赚不到认知之外的钱。

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